For the most part rumors suck, as they seem intentionally vicious, based on made-up speculation, to hurt or deceit, misdirect, confuse, derogate and degrade. Can we find anything positive in spreading and/or being entertained by rumors? Should we consider ourselves ignorant when we pass them on so freely? I haven’t found any redeeming categories that give us an option between good rumors and not so good rumors; if you think of any, would you please let me know?
Though social sciences have not really fessed up to a crystal clear definition of the term rumor, it seems that: “an unverified account or explanation of events circulating from person to person and pertaining to an object, event and/or of public or personal concern,” should somewhat make the term more understandable – or perhaps not even close.
In social study classes (or any nearby bar), the game of passing a specific set of information from one person to another, is rather eye-opening and fun; depending on the quantity of alcohol inhaled. In whatever scenario, it clearly shows us, how effortless we self-manipulate and produce incorrect information. We do not do this on purpose, of course; because this is just how it is.
“Carol will arrive at 8:30 PM, wearing a red skirt, a flowered blouse and matching handbag.” Nothing complicated. Sift that sentence through 10 people and if lucky, it comes out as: “Harold went through PMS again, causing a red alert and flour on his shirt and what was that last bit? Douche-bag?” (True story).
Another thing about rumors is that it can rarely, if ever, be verified or confirmed with respect to actual and true information. If we could easily confirm any trueness of a rumor, then wouldn’t it slip into: “the truth is…” category? So it seems that when we run into a rumor, we automatically discard the notion that it could have anything to do with the truth; but we listen anyway – and in many cases with really big ears, just because of the lack of truth - weird.
Rumors are nicely tugged in between gossip and propaganda. Gossips are the lighter side of: “not really the truth, but fun anyway, and not really that intentionally hurtful,” (as long as it doesn’t involve me, of course). Propaganda is the hardcore side of rumors, where spreading misinformation and disinformation are done with calculated and intentional purposes, for the sole single-mindedness of controlling results and emotions in the target it’s aiming at. Propaganda is really nasty stuff, because it can never be any good. This form of manipulation can be used on small groups or the whole population of a country; and propaganda is unfortunately still abused on populations in certain countries today – and how disturbing is that?
Rumors can be used as a tool (or weapon, if you prefer?) in all kinds of situations. I can start a rumor about a (former) friend and look rather innocent in the process, beginning my deliberate false information to hurt this person by: “Did you hear…?” and the ball is rolling, with me claiming instant ignorance, because I stated that I heard it from somebody else… It is terribly easy to cut anybody down and the main reason being that we place too much “validity” in rumors. And another dreadful thing is, that when a rumor is flying around out there, it is very difficult to shoot down; actually near impossible to even hit.
“The rumors about me and "that other woman”, are not true. I do not know who you are talking about and I have never had an affair with her or anybody else, for that matter.” And I can repeat that till I’m blue in the face. In spite of my wife, kids, pets and friends assuring they believe me, I am still, from that moment on, marked with the proverbial dark cloud of rumor-doubt floating above me. And rumors do that, they leave doubt, no matter how untrue those rumors are.
Somebody started a rumor – for fun: “At the party last Saturday, did you see how Kenneth French kissed that slut, what’s her name?” And poor Kenneth is now devastated; his wife heard that rumor too, quickly kneed him (where it really hurts) and told him to go to Hell. The irony is that he had not even attended that party – instead, he went bowling with John and Bob (Kenny pretty much hates parties). But now, innocent Kenneth had fully experienced the power of rumors, by momentary loss of wife, as well as suffering the extreme pain from two certain parts of his anatomy being flattened by an angry knee attached to distraught wife. (She later on tried to “un-knee” the damage with kisses, but that hurt even more – we should give her points for trying, don’t you think?)
So how can we defend ourselves against rumors and even gossip? Our chances stretch from near impossible to not possible at all; great odds, huh? Okay, we can try to live a picture perfect life, do all the right things, smile when needed, etc. still, nothing will protect you. People will ask if the rumors circulating about you are true, and you adamantly deny that they are not. But doesn’t that more so show guilt? You might smile defensively, shake your head, roll your eyes and continue life; and then they call it denial. You cannot un-rumor yourself – it’s impossible. If you have ever succeeded, please let me know – seriously; I would really like to know how you did it.
Of course you could be an unethical jerk and defend yourself by start circulating nasty rumors about the one who is trying to get you – but would that be within your character, the ethics of who you are? Nah, don’t answer that – let’s keep it to ourselves.
What I’m concerned, there is a peculiar interpretation of rumors that journalists and reporters have available. Now, don’t get all huffy puffy, but swing with it, please. They can actually report stuff and “expose” information to readers, as the truth without legally having to reveal “the source” or “where they got it from”. Though demanded by judges at times, some will even keep their “source” hidden while paying fines and/or spending time in jail. So where am I going with this?
I don’t understand this legal availability of “freedom”, as it at times no doubt causes made up stuff to be passed on as the truth; to be able to manipulate “the truth” and nothing but – and not have to reveal where you got it from; the “source”. Wouldn’t you more so call this: “rumors with benefits”?
I do believe that the ethics of this issue is applied by most journalists and reporters, I do not doubt that at all; but it’s that slight and legally covered opening for temptation, bringing on a more colorful and exceptional story - that to me, gets a tad foggy. Oh well; we have the freedom to believe what we want to believe and I guess we should apply as needed.
Rumors are used to gain ground and profits in business and in all forms of life within our society; in politics, sports, academia – and so forth. For the most part rumors are not started to make anybody or anything look favorable and nice; only if fully intended to. That’s why I’m okay with gossips, as it doesn’t seem to be something we take too serious (except if it’s about me, of course).
It’s easy to start a rumor; any rumor. It is also irresponsible for the most part. It’s easy because if it is something with even the slightest negative connotation, we tend to find listeners faster – and I don’t fully know why that is; do you?
Though it’s easy to start rumors, why don’t we try not to do that, and while we are at it, why not stop any rumor we hear, from continuing – let’s just stop it right now. And remember, if you ever hear any negative rumors about me – it would be so untrue – so please discard at once and don’t pass it along, no matter how juicy - I thank you in advance…
Till next Monday – let’s make it a rumor-free week, okay? And good luck with that.
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