From parents and a huge assortment of aunts and uncles,
grandmas and grandpas as well as from a lot of people we didn’t know or even
cared about, we heard the proverbial: “What are you going to be when you grow
up?” Even as a kid it was an embarrassing question. Of course, if you are asked
at the age of 43, it’s even more embarrassing, valid or not. What DID you want
to be when you grew up? Did you pursue your dream – or did you end up in a
‘career’, doing something totally different?
‘Career’ has several meanings; the ‘career’ I’m
talking about, is related to the working aspect of an individual, something we
chose, pursue and do, to create some cash for a living. And talking about ‘career’
isn’t it weird that we have the term ‘career-woman’ but not ‘career-man’? As
far as I know.
I grew up in a simplistic era (1822) and the career
choices reflected that. Fire-fighter or policeman for the boys and something
like motherhood or nurses for the girls. No, I’m not aiming at sounding male
chauvinistic, just stating facts.
As I slowly morphed into teenage-years and acne, my
career dreams changed accordingly. I seriously cannot recall anything else,
career-wish-wise, from that time that I wanted to do, other than it had to be
something creative as in writing movie-scripts, acting, directing, etc. Those
choices were never based on fame and fortune (with lots of beautiful starlets constantly
crawling all over me in high heels and bikinis), but was simply something I
found interesting and intriguing, challenging and exciting – at 14 - and I
still do at 69 (except the ‘starlet’ thing).
I’m sure I’m not alone in the ‘…but then I woke up’ when
my career-dreams evaporated from something I really wanted to do, to something
I had never thought about. My mother’s new husband (whom I adored), was a
successful business owner and he wanted me to take over when he retired. So he
pretty much plotted my ‘career’ from apprenticeship to factory owner – and a
lot of cash. I more or less went from ‘to
be or not to be’ to ‘can I help you?’
Then he sold the factory as I was in mid-education, and that sucked – big time…
But my ‘career’ was actually going well; ‘well’, more
so based on my income, where I would have treasured a well-written script made
into a movie. Stranded in business, it was obvious that ‘creativity’ was
actually a core part for success. The more innovative and creative I could be,
the more cash came in. At times, when I compared and dreamed of what could have
been and what was, I did feel like I had prostituted myself for the cash, by abandon
my initial calling. But looking at the bigger picture, I do not have any
complaints… If I could do it over, roll time back to my moment of career
decision, I would have stuck with my original dream, no not the fire-fighter,
but the creative route.
I did make some of those earlier dreams come true
later in life, as I wrote and publish two books – when I was 64; better late
than never?
Anyway, so how are you doing? Did your initial dream
come true? Are you doing what you originally felt would be a satisfying career?
Or did you end up doing something totally different? I don’t think I’m wrong
stating that many to most of us did not end up in that earlier career dream.
Not that it’s a bad or negative thing, just a statement of facts. I must
believe that we adjust according to our circumstances and do find some or a lot
of joy in what we end up doing job/career-wise; I certainly hope so, or else…
We keep asking kids what they want to be and when we
look at the possibilities today and in the immediate future, can you imagine
how hard those choices are? Fire-fighter and policeman doesn’t seem tough
decisions in comparison.
Would I be able to choose and pursue a career dream
in today’s environment? Yes I would, because as mentioned, I would stay the
course and energetically go after that ‘creative’ world I dreamed about at 14.
Could I do it now – at 69? I am kind-of doing it now to some extent, as I am
doing a lot of creative writing, and it satisfies me no end – cash not involved.
Do I ever think of what could have been? At times, but only rarely, as in:
‘what’s the point?’
Of course, asking a kid about his or her future is still
a bit silly, as a kids’ future is pretty much covered by: ‘what’s for dinner?’
As we grow older with some of us maturing a bit through high school, we begin to
realize that ‘oh crap’ we are getting close to where we have to, need to choose
something ‘career-wise’, some kind of direction in life…
And it really isn’t fair that we at such an early
stage have to make such a major (huge) decision. We do not have the maturity
and certainly not the experience, to decide what to do the next 45 years or so.
It really isn’t fair, huh? Sure we can and do make adjustments on the way, but
we are still looking and guessing if we should go left or right, up or down.
So we (carefully?) choose a major highway. I mean,
I’m positive that our local proctologist didn’t decide on that career at 14 (if
he or she did, that would be a bit weird, huh?) So it starts with a medical
education and specifics later on. Business administration is another broad
avenue to travel, as the possibilities will open up down the road, etc. You get
the idea…
I often ask people if they are satisfied and perhaps
even happy with what they are doing. I ask them if that was their initial
‘dream’, and most answer with a giggle and ‘no, not quite… but it’s a job’… As
I drill them a bit more, I have found that most actually do like what they are
doing (and universally, everybody wants more money for whatever they do – duh…)
I am in utter awe every time I am exposed to
somebody who is so good at their job; no matter what the heck it is they are
doing. I respect and appreciate these people and often ask them, to confirm, if
they like what they do – and they always do. I also tell them that I’m
impressed – and that is received with a smile and ‘thank you’…
We must realize and be very thankful for those who
are doing some awesome and exceptional jobs, jobs that a ‘normal’ person
couldn’t even dream of being able to do or wants to do. The heroes and heroines
in the medical field, from trusted and dedicated nurses, to highly specialized
surgeons. Would I fly a plane with a load of 300 passengers? No way. What about
becoming a soldier and go off to some foreign lands and risk your life? Won’t
happen. And you can make your own long list of ‘not me’...
We all know what we would like to see when looking
in from the outside, ‘fantasizing’ it’s called – Peter and the starlets (only
kidding). But I also believe that for the most part we are all kind of okay and
perhaps even happy, with what we do and what we did. Would I really go back and
do it over with some changes? No I wouldn’t. I did just fine, a career mixed
with happiness, lots of challenges, creativity, meeting some exceptional people
on the way, many crappy moments, and then receiving some cash for the overall effort
– making a living. It was not what I saw at age 14, but when I finally woke up
(retired), I acknowledged that it had not been bad at all – for the most part.
