Monday, June 11, 2012

CHIVALRY – what the heck happened?

Chivalry is dead,” she said, staring at the ground with sad and teary eyes. He reached for her hand and tenderly held it: “I’m so sorry to hear that; was she a good friend of yours?” Unfortunately, that is pretty much how dead chivalry is today.
Back in medieval times, the code of conduct for those shiny knights, underlined the virtues of honor, by serving their lords and the God above, as well as striving to “protect others who cannot protect themselves”; that would be women, the golden oldies, children and especially defenseless bunnies named Fluffy.
An even more important part of this code of conduct required the knights to thoroughly honor women, who at all times should be approached with kindness, courtesy and respect. Now, if I’m not totally lost in history, this great attitude towards women and other fair females on the home-front, they outright stole from the Vikings (my rough & tough ancestors). You see, the Viking male population respected and totally accepted that Viking women were in full charge at home and the key-holders to the family treasure chests – and as we acknowledge this, has anything really changed a heck of a lot since then in that department?
But where is that chivalry attitude today? No, I don’t expect all males to dress up in recycled beer-cans and carrying long shiny sticks, big shields and heavy metal hats decorated with colorful feathers, as was the fashion so many hundred years ago. I’m not asking you to grab those two half coconut shells, banging them together to emulate a charging white stallion – I’m not talking about that kind of chivalrous attitude; because that is still fully controlled and owned by Monty Python.
I’m talking about what chivalry should be like today: kindness, courtesy and respect towards each other. And “towards each other”, as we should break down all gender lines, making that a part of our code of conduct – please.
Chivalry is fairly dead today; but let’s do a bit of CPR (for those who do not know: cardiopulmonary resuscitation, stuff you do to get the old ticker ticking again), and see if we can bring some spark back into that near rigor mortis old friend of ours; let’s start pumping some new life back into chivalry
Back in the sixties, in the bra-burning days of women’s rights and fight for equality, a lot of issues had been simmering for years and finally popped up. All of a sudden a male opening a door for a female, became more so a chauvinistically dominant insult than the courtesy it used to be – so chivalry and a bit of male pride flew out the window along with the burning bras. I always thought that was so sad; not the bra-thing, of course, but the other stuff – even back then.
Growing up, I was taught kindness, courtesy and respect towards anybody, and I never had a problem with that. It is still something I do automatically and as naturally as breathing and not watching reality-shows.
I don’t get to open many doors for my wife, because she tends to be too fast. I believe it’s because she is self-efficient and independent (also of Viking blood), that it doesn’t even cross her mind to “let” me be her courtesy knight in shiny shorts and flip-flops (this is California, you know – that’s what we all wear – all the time – even to bed – sleeping next to our surfboards, of course – but you already knew that, huh?) Racing past her, smashing her to the ground to reach the door first, so I can open it for her, isn’t the kind of chivalry we are looking for, is it? But there’s an idea…
We all agree that we like getting attention. We can also agree that we like giving attention, and not just to Fluffy. So with that established, getting back to using chivalry as a positive part of our lives should be a piece of cake.
Keep up the CPR; I think we are getting a pulse…
I open doors for anybody if the timing is appropriate. No, I’m not waiting hours on end for somebody to show up, so I can do my Knight in Shiny Shorts bit; because that might be really weird. But I open many doors and just about everybody smiles and says thanks; well, just about everybody.
Yes, there are the ones who walk through with sour faces and no smiles, just too blooming busy; not even a bloody thank you. But I do like them, because they give me a grand opportunity to loudly say: You’re welcome, with a strong smell of sarcasm, of course. I just love that part; it’s a verbal kick in their pride. For the most part, they do acknowledge that they were rude and ignorant; many of them turn around somewhat embarrassed and then they smile and spittle out something sounding similar to thank you.
But the ones who fail to do that, I run after, grab them, throw them violently to the ground and then I kick the royal crap out of them, teaching them a lesson or two about kindness, courtesy, respect and chivalry – well, in my dreams, for the most. But it would be cool, solving such annoyance with utter violence. I would have made such a good knight, don’t you think? And I would also have used one of them shiny pointed things…
We are getting close to a normal pulse now, and thanks to your help and willingness to bring new life into our old friend chivalry, there is a huge possibility of a glorious resurrection – amen!
The simple act of smiling, as I have mentioned in earlier posts, is also part of chivalry, because by smiling we are acknowledging the presence of another human being on our way. Holding doors and all that other stuff, does make for a better life around us, because I know that we all care. Let’s show some more kindness, courtesy and respect and honor those codes the knights lived by – so many hundreds of years ago; because it still works today, it really does – a lot.
Till next Monday (and beyond): LONG LIVE CHIVALRY

I WONDER Department:
I guess it was okay back then to say: Good morning, knight. But perhaps saying Goodnight, knight was deemed silly and inappropriate? Does anybody know?

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