Sunday, March 1, 2015

NAKED – let’s have another peek



Not that I want to strut around in my birthday suit (for you foreigners, meaning so totally bare); but really, what’s the big deal? What is it that makes us so extremely uncomfortable with nakedness, the exposure of genitals, buttocks and breasts? Why are we so protective of our own nudity? Well, you’ll get all the answers here, at least from where I’m sitting - all naked. Nah, just kidding as that would be weird on too many levels – even for me. So let’s have a peek.

Evolving as a species back in the days, we all started out naked and still do. We quickly figured out to cover up by dressing according to the weather and still do. Eskimos in Northern Greenland do not go out with their spiky things to hunt bears being totally naked and Hula-dancing girls in Hawaii do not perform in fur-skirts and matching mittens. Well, you get the idea.

With respect to ‘naked’ I’m not proposing that we ignore the weather and strut around as bare as can be ‘just because’. Can you envision the awkwardness of checking out at the super-market with a long line of nude people in front of you; that image makes me shiver as in: ‘Oh My God’. How about ‘Casual Friday’ at the office turning into ‘Naked Everyday’ and the ‘Boston Marathon’ becoming the ‘Boston Nakedthon’ – enough visuals to make you puke? But it’s not really that kind of ‘naked’ I’m concerned about – though I probably should be.

We are constantly bombarded by the media, movies, TV shows, commercials, magazines, etc. We are told to buy this, exercise that and eat whatever. Lifestyle-wise we are all affected by these bombardments, if we admit it or not. 

Through this constant bombardment we have also been ‘taught’ a million times what the human body should look like. All women should be slim with shapely buttocks, an equivalent pair of perky breasts, long legs, full lips and hair to match. All men should have tall, lean and muscular bodies with washboard abs, sculptured arms, strong legs, pearly white teeth and a five o’clock shadow. Sounds surprisingly like it could be me – only kidding… except for the five o'clock shadow.

But that is not the real world – at all. To me it’s fluff, though I appreciate nice looking bodies, naked or not, anytime – but here on Earth, true nakedness and body-shapes are such different stories. We should appreciate and enjoy what we have and not compare with fantasy laden images of what is considered body-perfection, because in that case only few of us will win – so you see, it’s not fair at all.

I like a tanned body, so I spend time in the back-yard in the rays, dressed only in Speedos and sun-screen. Would I lie on the beach in that outfit? Nope, as in: Are you kidding me? 


The reason is that I certainly do not look like Michelangelo’s David or like any of the dudes described above. First, I need to lower my weight, sculpture (cool term) my body in most places, etc. You might know the routine. So the point is that I am not even close to what is depicted and pumped up to be this unattainable for us ‘normal’ people, body-perfection, what we are ‘supposed’ to look like, what we no doubt want our bodies to look like. So this body-perfect image we mentally carry with us, gets in the way of implementing and accepting the physicality of the bodies we actually have, as well as most of the bodies we are surrounded by. 

This concept of delusional perfection creates insecurities, embarrassment, awkwardness and anxieties concerning our own nudity. When we feel bad about the way our bodies look, of course we will always find ways to cover it up, keeping any nakedness to ourselves - amen.

For the most part we are brought up in the world of ‘naked-phobia’, meaning that naked is not considered good. But naked is of course not bad at all, really. For crying out loud, we carry ‘naked’ with us all the time, covered up or not. It is a huge part of who and what we are. But remember, exposing too much nakedness can also put you in jail, embarrass the heck out of your parents, make people point and giggle and make others nauseated; so use a bit of moderation – if you really have to.

As kids we are no doubt deeply damaged and scarred for life when we accidentally rush into our parents’ bathroom and see mom or dad or even worse, see BOTH of them naked. They all scream bloody murder while quickly trying to cover up their genitals and in mom’s case, genitals and as many breasts as possible... But it is all too late as the horrendous destruction is forever etched unto our brains, as an everlasting horrific memory. 

So what do we learn from this? That parents should always lock the door to the bathroom. Not that easy, as it unfortunately informs the kids that being naked is shameful and disgusting (and in some cases it is); at least that's what we acknowledge by our parent's reaction. Yeah, damaged for life we are.

 But showing off our bodies is something we still do anyway, no matter how ‘naked’ is perceived. We wear clothes that underline what’s underneath (our naked bodies, duh…). In most cases I’m all for it, as there are a lot of nice (normal) bodies around. They can be imagined with tight pants and shorts, body-fitting tops, T-Shirts, low-cut blouses, tank-tops and so on. Some clothes can be so revealing that using ones imagination is a waste of time – and in some of those cases I’m all for it, I really am, because I appreciate the human body in most cases – always have.

I cannot revolutionize the naked morality issue here in the USA, change it to something a lot more relaxed. When looking at the beaches in most of Europe, you’ll see thong-clad topless females or simply naked in all their serene nudity. Men in all shapes and bodily forms strap on the tiniest Speedos, guts and all hanging out. But it’s the sense of acceptance of this nakedness, not being a big deal and therefore the lack of curiosity that makes it, well, so natural – as it should be; a much more relaxed attitude.

We talk about ‘private parts’ as if it’s the work of the Devil. In some countries women must cover up their faces; I wonder if that is also a ‘private part’. Here we can show noses, elbows, the occasional knee, an ear and so forth; but genitals, butts and breasts are to be covered at all times – or else…

‘Private parts’ is as ingrown a term we can get; but is it good or bad? You see, that is the question and no matter how much society’s ethics and laws try to fight this issue, we can still learn to be more relaxed about ‘those’ parts, be more acceptable and relaxed about our own bodies by halting the comparison with those ultra-body perfections we so desperately are trying to apply and honestly have a hard time living up to; at least for most of us.  

I have always been fascinated with human brains (great transition, huh?) I am very absorbed about what’s going on in there. Bodies are fine, but show me an interesting brain and I’m sold; and your body can look like whatever – pretty much. What I have between my ears I seriously consider my ‘private parts’, because it’s where ‘I am, who I am, what I am’, mixed with trillions of emotions, thoughts, knowledge and the list is utterly long; a lot of that stuff is extremely private, a lot more so than those three physical things we have a hard time mentioning or even look at (Yuk, Barf & Hurl) – but you know what they are.



Bodies are just that: bodies; especially when naked. With that said, we should and must always take good care of them, as they are the only ones we’ll ever get and which we will carry around from birth till death. So let’s respect our bodies more by not being so critical by comparing to (media) perfection? Let’s be a lot more accepting, respecting and appreciating of our bodies and the bodies around us – as is. I seriously trust that when we do that, we’ll also become a lot more relaxed concerning nakedness, nudity and bare-all; and perhaps someday, become less uptight about those ‘private part’ things? Pushing it a bit too far? Okay, but I tried…

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