Yes, at times I’m as
blocked as the best of them, including Shakespeare and Hemingway. Of course
they don’t have writer’s block anymore, but I sure have. It’s not a life and
death issue, though at times it feels like it. It’s more that my plan is to
publish a new post the first and fifteenth of each month; shouldn’t be a big
deal, because for a few years I published a new (and exciting?) post every
blooming Monday. How the heck was I able to do that, huh? So 140-some
blog-posts later, am I all emptied out? Seems like it… But I shouldn’t be; far
from.
All this pressure comes
from me - nobody else. It’s a tad pathetic, because not a single (or married)
person or any small animal named Fluffy tells me what to do and when - not a
one. I am not faced with deadlines set by a domineering, mean and demanding
publisher, who actually takes “deadline” literally – by implementing a professional
firing squad. Monetary gain has no place in getting me to write or not to
write, but could surely be a lovely encouragement (sigh). Send me some cash and
I’ll come up with something really fast… on the way to the bank. And the more
cash, the faster I write…
I do not receive any
threatening communication from readers, of which there are over 30,000 from
over 132 countries or something like that. Nobody goes into a confused frenzy,
life-altering tirade because “Peter
didn’t do that blog-thing on that specific date… as he used to...” It’s
like nobody else cares or worry more than I do – but maybe I’m not the only
one. Like, do you care?
The thing is that I am
actually really fine with either of the ways, because looking at the daily statistics,
I am still at the point of being in total awe of the (yes) worldwide interest
in what I write, the interest in my blog (when not having writer’s block, of
course); I do thank you so much for reading - really.
And then the kicker is that
I do have so many pieces done already and many in draft-form. Working titles
like ‘DEATH - so bloody final’, “WHO AM I - who are you?’, ‘DATING - a second
go at it’; a lot of half-done and some fully finished pieces. But as I am very
critical of my own work and need to be in a good mood, forgiving, intoxicated or
just simply ignorant (ha ha), giving my blessing to finished pieces are jeopardized
– at times.
Before I started LIFE AS
IT REALLY IS (in 2011), my plan was and still is, to write something light, not
with a lot of fluff, but with a bit of fun and at least something, if not a lot
of something we didn’t really know before; perhaps something we were aware of,
but didn’t really think about - but maybe we should? I think I succeeded, at
least when considering that I still write all this stuff for me; that so many
thousands of readers out there in InternetLand like to read it as well, is the
proverbial frosting on the cake.
I do experience writer’s-block
at times. Considering the trillion subject-matters still readily available, why
is it that I can’t write one bloody line? My life, as my writing (which I have
done all my life), has always been based on simplicity. Why complicate simple
matters? Why blow simple issues out of unreachable proportions? Doesn’t make
sense; does it? And still, not a single idea pops up…
So I should be able to
find many of those simple everyday items to write about, stuff that we do, talk
and think about a lot - but don’t pay much attention to. We are fortunate to be
able to find humor in so many things - even the most serious sides of life, but
at times I do have problems finding this stuff to write down.
I like making people
smile and laugh; it gives me so much positive energy. If I ever die, my
tombstone would say: “If I made you laugh - I lived”. But at times I don’t know
how to make you laugh - yeah, can’t even make me laugh…
Other reasons for
writer’s block would be a ‘foul-to-really-crappy mood’, ‘time-restrictions’
(which is a really stupid reason, as I am so retired and should be in full control
of all my own time). ‘Out of cool ideas’ is just a bloody lethargic reason for
not looking for something that is surrounding us in utter masses and needs to
be written about.
But I do find that for
the most part the lack of luster concerning putting something down, get going
with fun topics and simply write, seems to be based on laziness to a large
extent; also ‘supported’ by the fact
that nobody or any one thing pressures me to perform. But that shouldn’t be my
excuse, because I do pride myself with certain ethics of doing what I plan to
do, especially when I already made a note in my calendar – serious stuff.
“Finish blog-post &
publish” is gawking at me the first and fifteenth of every month. Deleting it if
not done is more painful than I like to admit, because it’s a very pathetic
feeling, as it has nothing to do with life or death, or anything close to those
things. It’s like I failed myself by not doing what I set out to do - and
that’s a feeling I seriously despise, no matter how important, no matter how
insignificant.
But it’s not just about
‘to write or not to write’. There are so many other aspects of our everyday
life where we are faced with ‘blocks & walls’ of all kinds. At times we hit
these blocks & walls trying to do things or fail to start tasks needed to
be started and done; while our brains go “HUH?” We know that if we really make
an effort, use a bit more of those 10% of our brains we actually use, then we are
able to fix it, do it and move on, while smashing through blocks or walls in
the process.
At times we don’t apply
the effort. We feel tired, bored, lazy, uninspired, in a crappy mood (my
favorite), mixed with lack of energy and interest. But you know what, that is
also okay, as we can’t be on top of our game all the time, as that would be so
bloody unexciting - don’t you think? Good excuse…
Okay, so what the heck
should I write about - let me see...
Here’s an idea: any
topics you want me to write about, please let me know. Hopefully you are not
suffering from ‘topics block’; huh?
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