Tuesday, May 31, 2011

WHY DO WE SAY THIS - when we mean that?

We freely use terms in the English language (and not only in English) where we consistently say one thing that actually means something else. Obviously we all know what is meant, but why can we just say it like it is?
GARAGE SALES. Have you ever found that to be true? Shouldn't it be: WE-HAVE-A-BUNCH-OF-OLD-CRAP-WE-WANT-TO-UNLOAD-ON-YOU SALES?
WINDOW SHOPPING. I-REALLY-DON'T-KNOW-WHAT-I-WANT-TO-BUY-BUT-I'M-IN-DIRE-NEED-OF-SPENDING-MONEY SHOPPING?
WHAT THE LABEL SAYS. "According to the Surgeon General women should not drink alcohol during pregnancy". What the label should say is: "According to common sense, men and women should not drink alcohol before pregnancy"
TO TELL YOU THE TRUTH. Up to this point I have been lying.
SHOP-LIFTING. You have to be really strong to do that, huh? And get away with it...
RESTROOM. We all know what's going on in there, and resting is not one of them.
CIVIL WAR. You tell me the civility of war - or did I get that wrong somewhere?
FINE (as in: traffic violation). I don't know about you, but "fine" is not what comes to mind with a $271 ticket in hand. How about: "not so fine"?

You get the idea, so by paying more attention to what we say, you'll see the silliness with respect to some of the stuff we unconsciously blurt out. But it's not only in English. Let's take Danish and my favorite word GIFT. So it means "present" in English, but in Danish it means "married"; the interesting thing is that it also means "poison" - on purpose?

Well, just something to take with you and have a great week, (and that's actually what it means).

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Wednesday, May 25, 2011

SPORADIC THOUGHTS - in small bits

*** You cannot be creative without the fear of failure

*** Remember that walking erect and walking with an erection  are two different things - please don't get them mixed up.

*** Is lying only unethical if you get caught?

*** Don't trust unfounded reality

*** Progress will move a lot faster when politicians start to work across the aisles. Elected by the people is a bestowed honor of confidence, expectations and hope. Unfortunately for those same people, disappointment is the common result.

*** As far as I know, it's the only sperm-bank with a drive-through window

*** For the good of mankind, there are certain people I hope will never reproduce

*** Heard in court (attorney):  "Let it be noted that I am a devout atheist, but for legal reasons, this was most certainly an act of God."

*** Sarcasm is just the charming rendition of cynicism

*** "I feel like an idiot."  "You should, it makes a lot of sense."

*** Do the Dutch speak the way they do because of the dope? (it's okay - I'm Danish, but no dope....)

*** We have the right to be wrong

*** Don't fail before you try

*** Why "rehearsal dinner" before a wedding. Don't people know how to eat?

*** I can't remember if I suffer from dementia

*** "You must be drunk; you look very blurry..."

*** One of my uncles only listened to radio-programs featuring frontal nudity...

*** Remember that being in love dramatically dims the light of common sense...

*** What I learned yesterday I used today to prepare for tomorrow

*** Since my dry-cleaners started out-sourcing to India, they discontinued same-day service; go figure...

*** Alcohol is getting too much credit

*** ...and talking about alcohol: That is what consensual sex for the most is sponsored by...

*** To tell you the truth, I don't know if I'm lying...

*** Tell him he's an idiot, it shows you care...

*** Winning the lottery is like eating lentil soup with chopsticks

*** Turning right can be wrong, but turning left can actually be right - go figure that one as well...

*** As a child I didn't know what to be when I grew up, so I decided not to grow up; it obviously worked.

*** Rabbits feet supposedly bring luck. I don't think the rabbits agree...

NO EXPLANATION NEEDED, BUT HERE IT IS ANYWAYS...

If you are confused about life as is, you are not alone. If you at times wonder what the heck we are doing here on Earth, you are not really that special, because we all do (maybe that IS rather special, come to think of it). If you roll your eyes and shake your head on a regular basis, you can consider yourself very normal - at least what I'm concerned. If some or all of the above is you to some extend or another, this blog is for you.

LIFE AS IT REALLY IS will underline some of the silliness around us, some observations we all see but rarely notice. Obscure things we do and say, that we take for granted as just that - and freely accept. We react to a lot of all this stuff with a giggle or a laugh, and that is actually how we should greet a lot of our daily surroundings. I'm here to put some of this stuff in perspective, to make it understandable, add a bit of logic where no logic is visible.

When you are stuck understanding observations you encounter, all you have to do is getting the question to me, and I'll clear it all out for you one way or another - perhaps.